The "MAMA NOOOOO!!!"Award of the Week

We are kicking it off early, thanks to singer Monica. While she goes through her hood rat phase (at least, we hope it's a phase), she continues to keep it "real" (*rolling eyes*) as she promotes her latest single, "Sideline Ho."

(Y'all, I can't make this stuff up. Truth is sho'nuff stranger than fiction!).

Anywho...yes, you too can have your triflingness immortalized for posterity. Just enter the "Sideline Ho" contest and have your entry picked as the winning one!

http://www.monica.com/sideline.html

Oh, but it gets better. This coonery is co-signed and co-sponsored by YouTube, that bastion of foolishness.

(That YouTube would be down with this nonsense, yet yank all the bomb old-school music videos due to "copyright violation", is just wack. But I digress.)

The Sideline Ho of the Year will win an all-expense paid trip to attend the Soul Train Awards with Monica on March 10. Also-rans will receive a video iPod.

*insert straight-faced Yahoo emoticon here*

All you have to do is make a short video of your Sideline Ho story (e.g., "that bastard had the nerve to sleep with his wife, while I was home all alone.") and upload it to YouTube. Bonus points will be given for extra drama (tears, screams, moans, church runs up and down your domicile. Think Nettie from The Color Purple when Mister drives her off his property with the rocks).

Jesus put his head down and bawled.

Unfortunately, I'm quite sure there have been hundreds (if not thousands) of YouTube uploads. Sharing men (especially black men) has been the new black for quite some time now. Plus, Superhead has demonstrated that women can get paid (legally) by exploiting their sexual prowess and immorality. For many black girls, this may be their only claim to fame ("My name is LaShaMaquonda Malika Natrika Jones, but you can call me Ebony. I won a video iPod and was favorited on YouTube 2,456 times as a contestant in the 2007 Give Up Your Sideline Ho contest, sponsored by Monica and YouTube.")

I wonder if this will spin off into a reality TV show? I can see it now: SURVIVOR: Sideline Hoes. Or maybe MTV True Life: I'm a Sideline Ho!. Set your TiVOs now, folks.

In the immortal words of Cedric the Entertainer: "Now what is we gon' do?"

Thanks for stopping by.